Thursday, April 12, 2012

It's My Party!

So, I am currently bedridden. Why? Yesterday morning I tripped over a cat toy in the kitchen, fell, and twisted my foot in a direction I am pretty sure the laws of physics and nature never intended. I heard a snapping sound but the pain didn't start until a few moments later. At first I thought I was okay. I managed to drag myself and my twisted foot into the the living room and began to sob. My son came rushing in from his bedroom and found me in a heap on the floor unable to speak. I just kept pointing at my foot.

I am very upset this has happened to me.  I am cursing everything: my foot, the cat, all his toys, anyone who offers to help me, and life in general. I had a very important meeting scheduled yesterday for an awesome job opportunity. I had already started putting all my eggs in one basket concerning the offer and now there was no way in hell I was going to make it into the office with my stupid foot. How was I supposed to get into the shower, get dressed up and drive to Huntington?  I could barely stand let alone squeeze my throbbing, swollen foot into a shoe.  I had intended on wearing my favorite faux-alligator pumps. They're super classy with sensible heels, but not too sensible. Just right.  Now everything was ruined. The job opportunity- most likely gone forever. I have a feeling I am going to be out of commission for quite some time.

I suppose I could have kept the appointment anyway. They would have been impressed with my tenacity had I just sucked it up and hopped into the meeting on one foot. I have a pair of neon pink, faux-fur lined clogs and because they are so wide and roomy, I was able slip my aching foot into one of those without screaming in pain. Then I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and how utterly ridiculous I looked. The sharp, shooting pains in my foot were also causing my face to contort in the most unusual ways. I decided to call and cancel the appointment.

I was hoping that by some miracle I would wake up this morning and the pain would be gone. No such luck. It still hurts. Badly. I have my foot elevated and I am applying ice packs to the area every twenty minutes. This is keeping the swelling down to a minimum but there is still no way I can stand on it or walk.  This really sucks!!

I must confess I am the worst patient ever. I am stubborn, irritable and nasty right now. I don't like being dependent on anyone and I am trying to do everything myself. I've set up camp on the couch with the remote control and the lap top and I am already bored out of my skull. I've decided to drastically reduce my consumption of  liquids because it takes me about fifteen minutes to get the bathroom. It's hysterical really and I am thankful my son is here. I managed slip on my clogs and hop into the kitchen this morning to brew a pot of coffee. I am actually pretty good at balancing on one foot (thank you, yoga) but I couldn't figure out how to hop back to the couch, coffee in hand, without spilling it all over myself. Believe me, I tried.  After he cleaned up the big mess I made, my son served me my coffee. That was awfully nice of him but in a few hours he will be leaving for work and will be gone the entire weekend. I will be left to my own devices and he will probably return home to find me passed out on the couch in my stupid pink clogs; dehydrated and starved half to death. I was supposed to go grocery shopping yesterday but obviously that didn't happen. Oh well. I wanted to lose a couple of pounds anyway.

All my plans for this weekend- shot. I had intended to drive to Brooklyn on Friday and then spend Saturday and Sunday at my sister's cabin up in the mountains. There's no way that's gonna happen now.  I will be a couch potato, against my will.  So not my style. Thank God for Netflix. Maybe, just maybe, I can get my web cam to work correctly so I can participate in a few Google+ Hangouts.  I love on-line shopping and maxing out all my credit cards by ordering stuff I don't need sounds like fun.  It's probably not the best idea, though, being that my current condition means I am not really earning much money. Luckily, my wallet is in a different room and I can't bear the thought of hopping all the way to the other end of house to retrieve it. My credit rating is safe, for now, but I'd better figure out some ways to use this down-time productively or I will go insane.

What have I learned from this? Nothing.  I am sure I'll eventually have some brilliant epiphany to share, but right now, I am just feeling sorry for myself.  And you know what? I think that's okay.  I should be allowed have my own little pity party now and then.  I am usually very hard on myself.  I rarely give myself permission to cry, complain, whine or ask for help.  Maybe that's the lesson I am supposed to learn.  I'll let you know.

For now, this is the shoe that fits and I'm wearing it..........

1 comment:

  1. Bless your heart. You should go to the doctor, if you've broken a bone they can set it and you might get a walking cast. My dog has toys all over the house and I've come close to being in your shoes, or rather the lack of them, before.